Interview Quotes

The Oprah Winfrey Show as a Classroom

"The Oprah Winfrey show is a front row seat to unhappiness."

— Oprah Winfrey • 00:50:14

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. You know, I learned it was my greatest classroom. I've never had a therapist, but I had so many therapists on the show. I got my therapy from the Oprah show and I learned so much."

— Oprah Winfrey • 00:50:25

"You wrote in the book that the heart of the Oprah Winfrey show was that it was a classroom."

— Nora O'Donnell • 01:23:35

"Mmm, yeah. And I think the heart of me is really a teacher."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:23:41

"One of the big lessons I learned from the show was this, that after every conversation, no matter who it was, in one form or another, that person would say, how was that? Was that okay?"

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:24:00

"And so what I started to see was that there was this thread that connected all of the conversations and that what people were really saying, they were looking for a validation, like, was that all right? Did you hear me? And did what I say matter?"

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:25:12

"I think that's why Arthur and I are so complimentary to each other, because that's what I've been trying to do my entire career, is help people see the fullness of themselves."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:30:00

"It's holding up a mirror so you can see. Even when you're looking at the most dysfunctional people that I'm talking to on the show, you can say, well, I'm not that and I don't want to be that. And oh, if they were able to triumph over that, I could triumph over that."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:30:24

Defining and Achieving Happiness

"And knowing that that thing was happiness came from the show. And every day I would sit and talk with the audience for a half hour, sometimes 40 minutes. A producer would be like, oh my God, when is she going to let go of the audience? What I really want is to have a conversation with the audience to see why did you come? And what did you get from the show?"

— Oprah Winfrey • 00:51:47

"And being able to answer specifically what that looks like for you is the beginning of being happier."

— Oprah Winfrey • 00:54:10

"So what, how do you define happiness? Well, you call it happier-ness."

— Nora O'Donnell • 01:00:00

"Yeah, I call it happier-ness. Because as Arthur explains in the book, none of us can be happy all the time. But I will say that I have reached a level of enjoyment, contentment, satisfaction, and purpose, that I'm pretty much happy all the time, even though I have negative feelings."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:00:15

"No, it is not the enemy. The unhappiness, and if, actually, one of the things that's so powerful, I think, about what Arthur has written specifically is about how your emotions are there to allow you to feel the feel and then take the wheel of this feeling that I'm having. I'm having this feeling, and now I need to do what? And not to allow yourself to be overcome by the feeling."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:48:00

"So my state of being is always a state of satisfaction, enjoyment, and purpose, which is what defines happiness. You need enjoyment, you need satisfaction, and you need purpose."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:40:39

"The ingredients to happiness, family. Friendships. Work. And faith."

— Nora O'Donnell • 02:44:38

"Faith meaning not religion, because we're not here to tell anybody about any religion you need to be, but you need a faith in something that's more transcendent than yourself."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:45:00

"My intention was to spread the message that you cannot control all of the external circumstances in your life, but you can control how you feel about those circumstances in your life."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:50:00

"The thing that I learned from him mostly is that we are in control of our happiness and happiness. You get to decide whether or not you choose to be happier or not. And it's not the circumstances."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:25:00

"And why do you call it happierness? Because getting there, it's not a destination. It's a direction."

— Nora O'Donnell • 02:26:00

"Yeah, I love that. I love that term."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:26:15

"The pursuit is within. The pursuit is to, first of all, have a great understanding of your own identity and what is required for you to be happy."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:36:00

"No matter what, I'm going to be okay. And I think that's what this book helps you get to. No matter what, I can be in control of how I choose to react regardless of the circumstance."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:32:00

The Power of Reflection and Control

"So I was a philosophy major and Aristotle of course talks about the power of reflection. So to hear you reflect about everything you learned on the show and as you write in the book."

— Nora O'Donnell • 00:47:00

"I made a conscious choice for my happiness early in my career that New York would not be the place that I would seek. My dream was Chicago."

— Oprah Winfrey • 00:57:50

"You write, one must recognize that the person in control of your happiness is and forever will be you."

— Nora O'Donnell • 01:58:00

"I know this, that many of the things that have happened to you have also happened for you. And that I learned when the crisis or the challenge showed up for me, I immediately would ask, sometimes out loud, but certainly in my own conscious spirit, what is this here to teach me?"

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:06:00

"And this, I guarantee you, the moment you have the conscious realization of, oh, this is why this is here, showing up to allow me to see whatever that is in your life, it changes for you."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:10:00

"I'm the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul."

— Oprah Winfrey • 02:59:00

"And so what that, taking control of your emotions and not allowing your emotions to control you, taking the will, allows you to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:00:00

Envy and Self-Worth

"Why do you think we're in a happiness slump in America?"

— Nora O'Donnell • 01:26:30

"Ooh, I will tell you, one of the most profound reasons, I think, is because everybody is looking at other people's social media, what they believe to be other people's lives, which is only a snapshot of other people's lives, and feeling envy about that."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:27:00

"And one of the things that Arthur and I talk about in this book is that envy is the great destroyer. The happiness killer. It is the happiness killer."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:27:30

"But inside myself, I feel that I am enough, which is one of the great lessons."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:31:00

"What is at the root of most people's dysfunction is that you don't think that you're good enough. You don't think that you're worthy. You don't own your own essence and your own power."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:31:45

The Genesis of the Book

"During the pandemic, I was in search of fuel to keep myself inspired, to keep myself open to possibility, to keep myself hopeful. And I started reading his column in The Atlantic and then looking more and more forward to that column every week on how to build a life."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:35:00

"So I am the kind of person, as you know, that believes that life is better when you share it, whether that's bread or information. And I called him up and I said, what you should do, I think, is take all these columns that you've written and put them in a book because I think people would really benefit from having all of that information in one space."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:39:00

"Well, he said, why don't we write a book together? And I said, well, you're the one, you're the professor, you're the one who's mastered in it. And he said, well, you've mastered too. You just don't teach it in a classroom. And I thought, well, that is true. And so I agreed to do it for that reason."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:41:00

"He said that when you called him, he was incredulous about, you know, meeting him, talking to him."

— Nora O'Donnell • 01:42:00

"Yes. He couldn't believe that Oprah was calling Arthur Brooks."

— Nora O'Donnell • 01:42:30

"Yeah. And, you know, sometimes that happens when I call up people for book clubs and they'll say, no, no, it isn't. And I go, yes, it's Oprah."

— Oprah Winfrey • 01:43:00

Daily Happiness and Gratitude

"So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so many things. I have trained myself that the first thought is thank you. That is my first thought. And then I move from, what do I have to do? Or what is this day?"

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:05:00

"But my first thought, no matter where I am in the world, is thank you. And that is also my last thought, going to bed."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:06:00

Oprah's Lack of Envy

"Is Oprah ever envious?"

— Nora O'Donnell • 03:07:30

"Mm-mm. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. It's just not a part of my..."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:07:45

"I'm happy for other people's happiness. I am particularly happy when other women rise."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:08:30

"I mean, when I heard you were going to be doing the evening news, I was so happy for you, because I remember when Barbara Walters first did that with Harry Reasoner and how horribly she was treated during that time. And at the time, I was being treated horribly too, you know, by even the local anchor. So for you to be able to sit at the helm in that seat, I'm nothing but happy for that."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:09:00

Oprah's Gift

"You have the gift of letting people see something that they cannot see themselves."

— Nora O'Donnell • • 03:26:00

"Do I? You do. Okay. I accept that."

— Oprah Winfrey • 03:26:15

"I think that's your gift."

— Nora O'Donnell • 03:27:00